


When The Light Returns

by AlwaysAmused



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: A writer must write, Aftermath of Possession, Angst, Blood, Dark Magic, Fluff and Angst, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Possessed Loki, Possession, Post-Avengers (2012), Pre-Thor: The Dark World, Thor hugs, Weird Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-25
Updated: 2015-01-25
Packaged: 2018-03-08 23:25:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3227462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysAmused/pseuds/AlwaysAmused
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“From there, I could see his memories, every time he was ignored, every time your disapproval rained down upon him. I saw his brilliance and his betrayal, and I turned it into rage. From there he thirsted for revenge, and I whispered instructions into his ear. Perhaps he knew I was there at the time, perhaps he did not. By the end, he did, when that green monstrosity those 'Avengers' called a Hulk. It was soon after that he realized I was there.”</p><p>A fic in which Loki is possessed by a thing. This is unedited and was written in all of two days. Warnings for violence.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When The Light Returns

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel. Obviously.

Loki was falling. It was dark and it was cold and not for the first time since letting go, _afraid_. It had been light when he had first let go, and it had been for a while, even if he couldn't truly appreciate it. But now it was dark, and he hadn't a clue as to when he would land, when he would die.

He regretted letting go. It was a stupid thing to do, really. After all, he hadn't done anything  _illegal_ , except let the Jotnar into Asgard on Thor's coronation. Everything else he had done while King, and so he technically couldn't be punished for that. He knew the laws inside and out.

He was hungry and he was thirsty and he was so very  _tired_ . He may have regretted letting go, but he just wished it would  _end_ , that he could be at  _peace_ and not be alone with his thoughts and the cold.

The ground came unexpectedly. It was still dark and cold, and he hit the ground like a mirror hitting a marble floor. He  _shattered_ , and a white agony spread through him, and he wanted to scream and scream and – and maybe he  _was_ screaming, but there was blood roaring in his ears and-

It was so very, very cold.

He was so very alone.

There was no sound.

There was nothing.

Nothing.

Dark.

.

.

.

.

And in the darkness, he was found.

When he woke, there was pain, but his body was whole.

And his mind screamed one thing, and one thing only.

_Revenge. Power. Rage._

In the darkness, Loki smiled.

* * *

“Loki Laufeyson,” Odin said as Loki was made to kneel before the throne, wrists and ankles bound in chains. “You are here under grievous charges. Have you anything to say in defense of your actions?”

Loki said nothing, eyes glaring at his former parent. Odin sighed.

“You are sentenced for your magic to be removed at dawn,” the Allfather stated. “Your mother could not bear to see you put to death. After that, you are to be imprisoned until the end of your days.” Loki remained silent and the Allfather turned his back, waving a hand at the guards. “Take him away.”

Loki was pulled roughly to his feet and pulled away, back to his cell. He said nothing and didn't even really  _do_ anything; just sat on the bed, cross-legged, eyes closed.

Frigga appeared a few moments later, an illusion only. She walked over to the bed and said “Loki?”

Loki's eyes remained closed. He didn't so much as flinch, and she sighed. “Loki, please look at me.”

He remained motionless and Frigga looked down. “I know you're upset,” she said quietly. “I know you might even be  _afraid_ , but believe me when I say this is for your own good.”

“Get out.”

Frigga looked up, face carefully neutral. “Why?”

“Get out, get out,” Loki hissed, eyes still closed. “Get _out_.”

Frigga reached out as though to stroke his cheek, but her hand simply went through him. With a sigh, she said “We love you, Loki. Never forget that we love you.”

Loki remained silent, and Frigga vanished a moment later.

.

.

.

.

Thor and Frigga were present for the magic removal, as were the most experienced mages, to overlook the sentencing. Odin himself would preform the deed.

Loki was once again forced to his knees, and Odin glanced at the mages, the eldest nodding, telling him wordlessly to proceed. He nodded back, very slightly, and turned to Loki, his arms bare and held out in front of him, palms up. Carefully, Odin began to draw the runes, traveling from Loki's elbow to the wrist, then doing the same on the other arm. He then drew a circle around Loki, and began to murmur a chant as he drew runes around the outside. Instantly, Loki's body tensed and he drew a sharp breath. Odin continued and Loki let his head loll back, clenching his jaw. The mages glanced at each other a his breathing became more labored.

Odin stood when he finished and stepped back. Thor was looking away and Frigga had tears in her eyes.

Exactly ten minutes after the runes had been completed, Loki cried out, his skin turning glowing green. He fell sideways and curled up, struggling to breath. Five minutes after that, he screamed. Five minutes after that, he was writhing. Frigga was openly crying now, hand covering her mouth. Odin and Thor were both turned away, and the mages were the only ones who remained, watching. Even they seemed horrified by what they saw.

“Get out!” Loki screamed. “Get out! Get out!”

An hour had passed. Loki had stopped screaming, but his mouth was agape and he was on his back, head turned to the side, his eyes half open, tears trickling down.

A minute passed and nothing happened.

Five minutes.

Ten more.

Thirty.

All at once, Loki's body clenched and his eyes snapped open, glowing green as his back arched off the ground and he screamed, green light and something that looked like smoke bursting forth from his mouth. Loki fell limp, eyes closed, and the light and the smoke shot to the ceiling, twisting as they separated, rushing at each other and fighting until two figures could be made out, almost human-like in their appearance, like ghosts, like mist. They continued to attach each other and the mages scattered to get out of their way. Odin got up as the smoke-being held down the green one, golden eyes looking down, and a too-large smile filled with pointed teeth. It grabbed the green one's head by what appeared to be hair, and cracked it against the ground, the other arm across its neck. The green being struggled, but didn't get up when the smoke-being stopped.

It got up, still leering down at the seemingly unconscious green being, and threw back its head, letting out a high-pitched cackle before just becoming a mass of smoke and flowing back into Loki's mouth, Loki's back arching again as it did so.

All was silent for a moment, the green light being hadn't moved. Slowly, Odin walked towards Loki., Gungnir out in front of him.

All at once, Loki sat up, head bent, still bound hands in his lap. He lifted them to his face and Odin said “Loki.”

Loki began to laugh through his fingers. “I won. I won! Ahahaha..... I won!” And he lifted his head, a mad smile on his lips, his eyes gold. Odin placed Gungnir at the Not-Loki's throat and snarled “Where is my son?”

“Gone!” The Not-Loki cackled. “You've destroyed him, son of Bor! You! Oh, ahaha! How _marvelous_...” The chains that bound his wrists disintegrated into nothing and he grabbed Gungnir, quick as lightning, tossing it to the side and tackling Odin, straddling his chest, still grinning madly. he then pointed towards the green light. “See that? Over there? His magic too intertwined with his soul... You ripped it right out, and me along with it! Oh, it's so good to have a body again... And a _Jotun_ at that!”

The Not-Loki changed, his hair remaining black, his skin turning chalk white. The markings upon his face were different; they were black and went in jagged shapes, unlike Loki's smooth ones. he let out a giggle as he leaped off Odin, making his way towards the mass of light. “Poor, poor Loki,” he tutted. “Broken, silly, idiotic son of Jotunheim.” he reached down with magic, black in color, and forced the green light into a ball, reaching down and picking it up, tossing it into the air.

“So full of _anger_ ,” he crooned, smiling and stroking the surface with a sharp, dark nail. “So full of rage and pain and _betrayal_. Such the perfect host for me...”

“Who are you?” Odin growled, standing. The creature looked up, eyebrows raised.

“Who am I? Who am _I_?” He smirked and tossed into the air, catching it. “My name was long ago forgotten, Borson, by even myself. But you may call me Kaoset. The Goddex of Chaos.”

“You are no god,” Odin said. “There are no gods. Go back from whence you came, you evil.”

“Go back to where...? Oh, Borson,” the creature began to laugh. “You could not send me back if you tried! I come from Ginunngagap; the void between Realms. My opponent was there too,” he added conversationally. “They have no name either.” he looked at the orb that was Loki's soul and murmured “I must admit, he really _was_ a pretty one. I should like to keep him.” Kaoset pressed his hands together, the orb between them, making it smaller, then creating a small pouch to put it in, hanging it around his neck.

“There we go,” he murmured, and looked around. “Ah,” he walked over to where Gungnir had been discarded and picked it up, glancing it over before shrugging and snapping it like it was no more than a twig. he tossed the pieces aside and turned to Odin. “Where is your power now, King of Asgard?”

Odin clenched his fists and jaw. “Give him back.”

“Who, Loki?” Kaoset asked, inspecting his fingernails. “Why should I? You forsake him long ago. That is what you said, isn't it? On the Bifrost? 'No, Loki.'” he flicked his eyes up at Odin. “Would you like to know how your son died, Borson? When I found him, he was half dead, his body and soul broken, and barely conscious, blood pooled under him. We heard his body hit the ground, my opponent and I. Twas the first sound we had heard since we had engaged in battle, a battle that has lasted eons upon eons. He was starved to death, his skin cracking with a lack for water. And so I did what any sensible being would; I healed him as best I could, and possessed him.

“From there, I could see his memories, every time he was ignored, every time your disapproval rained down upon him. I saw his brilliance and his betrayal, and I turned it into rage. From there he thirsted for revenge, and I whispered instructions into his ear. Perhaps he knew I was there at the time, perhaps he did not. By the end, he did, when that green monstrosity those 'Avengers' called a Hulk. It was soon after that he realized I was there.”

The monster turned away. “I would love to stay and chat, but I've my opponent to fine and destroy. I will be taking my leave now.”

And before anyone could do anything, the Goddex of Chaos vanished without a trace.

* * *

It was several days later that Another appeared. It was an orb of white light that hung in the middle of the throne room. Odin called the mages and Frigga, and they stood around it. Odin then said “Who are you?”

The orb lengthened downwards and appeared as a person, eyes blue, mouth small. she blinked up at him and a voice spoke softly.

“My name was long ago forgotten,” he whispered. “But you may call me Roen, the Goddex of Tranquility. I am looking for my opponent, and the boy whom he possessed.”

“They are gone,” Frigga said. “We know not where they went.”

The creature tilted her head and blinked. “Do not give up hope. he will return when he knows I am here.” she looked around. “I must find a suitable host.”

“No,” Odin refused. “That... The other one already took my son; I will not allow you to take possession of another of-”

The creature sighed and looked back at Frigga, looking her up and down. “You will do until I find another, more suitable host.” Before anything could be done, she had rushed at Frigga and had vanished, Frigga gasping and stumbling back. Odin's eyes widened.

“Frigga!”

Frigga swayed and placed a hand against her chest. “Oh. That was... strange.” She blinked and placed her hands on her temples. “Ah, I see. Yes...” She turned and said “Odin, we must find an Elf who is willing to accept Roen.”

“What... Get out of her!” Odin snarled, and Frigga held up her hands.

“Darling,” Frigga sighed. “she won't harm me. Just help me.”

A moment later, Frigga's eyes turned a violet and a voice was wasn't hers said “Frigga will be fine, King Odin. You've my word upon that, however an Elf would be a much better host.”

Odin clenched his jaw and turned. “Get that servant, whatever her name is. The dark haired one.

.

.

.

The girl stood before Odin, twisting her apron in her hands.

“Do you practice magic?” Odin questioned.

“Y-Yes, your Majesty,” the girl said, eyes flicking around as she pushed her hair back from her eyes.

“Close your eyes,” Frigga said. The girl glanced around with big yellow eyes and then did so. “Like this?”

“Perfect.” White mist came from Frigga's mouth and entered the girl, who's eyes snapped open and turned violet. Her hair turned white and her skin a dark brown. She grew a bit taller as well, and sighed, head lolling back.

“It is wonderful to be back in a solid form,” she breathed, opening her violet eyes again. White magic came from her fingertips and she clothed herself in an orange robe, tying her hair back. “And now,” she murmured softly, “We wait for my opponent.”

“he called himself Kaoset,” Odin said to her. “The Goddex of Chaos?”

“That he is,” Roen nodded, smiling gently. “And he will come, once he has felt my presence.”

“And what happens then?” Frigga asked. Roen turned to her.

“And then we fight,” she sighed. “Just as we always have. Just as we always will.”

“Will we get him back?” Frigga asked. “Loki? Will he return to us?”

“I am unsure, Queen Frigga,” Roen replied gently. “And if he does, I am uncertain of what he shall remember. He was in a bad way when we found him. If I can expel him from Loki's body, I can get him back to Ginunngagap, and we may continue out battle.”

* * *

He came back three months later, a long thin sword in either hand. Roen walked out with nearly identical swords, and said “Chaos.”

“Tranquility,” Kaoset replied, a smile upon his lips. “What a lovely surprise.”

“Come out from that body,” she said. “Please; I do not wish to force you from him.”

Kaoset sneered. “Make me.”

Roen sighed and lifted her swords. “Then let us begin.”

.

.

.

.

Five days later, Roen returned to Asgard. She had led Kaoset to Svartalfheim so none would be harmed during their battle, leaving Thor to worry over the fate of Loki.

But she had returned, and she had returned carrying a body. There were scratches upon her face and arms, and her robes were torn, but she carried Loki to the healing rooms and put him in one of the beds, instructing Frigga to sit next to the bed, telling Eir what to do as she went around the room.

“I cannot _believe_ they use magic removal as a punishment,” Roen snarled, drawing runes around the bed. “Don't you silly Aesir know the consequences? I suppose you only do this usually to those who haven't been practicing magic for very long...”

Odin said nothing, simply watching with a bowed head. Roen smoothed Loki's hair back and began to remove the runes around his arms. “Magic removal was once a method of torture. So long as you didn't leave the circle, you wouldn't die. It was excruciating.” She finished removing the runes, and place different runes instead, hand steady as she went along. When they were finished, the took the sack that Kaoset had put Loki's soul in, and removed the orb, still glowing. She let it expand again and chanted softly as she pressed it to Loki's chest, gently coaxing it back into his body.

When it was in, she pressed two fingers to his throat, frowning. “Hmm.” She placed both hands back on his upper chest and pressed, forcing her weight into it, over, and over before pressing her fingers back to his throat, then putting a hand in front of his nose and mouth.

“He's fine,” she announced at last, pulling back. “He may be ill when he comes too, and I am unsure as to what he will remember. I advise you not to take him out of the circle, or to remove the runes from his arms until he wakes.”

“Thank you,” Odin said. Roen smiled gently and nodded, then went to another bed and laid down. A white mist came out of her mouth and she changed back into the servant girl, the mist fleeing back to Ginunngagap.

* * *

Loki was falling. It was dark and it was cold and not for the first time since letting go,  _afraid_ . It had been light when he had first let go, and it had been for a while, even if he couldn't truly appreciate it. But now it was dark, and he hadn't a clue as to when he would land, when he would die.

It suddenly grew light again. He squinted and tried to close his eyes, but it was seemingly impossible. It grew brighter and brighter, and he wanted to scream and scream and – and maybe he _was_ screaming, but there was blood roaring in his ears and-

Loki woke to someone stroking his hair. It was a gentle hand that knew all the right places to stop and scratch, only offering a little pressure here and there, nails gently scratching his scalp.

He could hear birds chirping somewhere.

He was _warm_.

Gently, his eyes fluttered open, light filtering in and he squinted a bit, sighing.

“Loki?” He blinked a few times, eyelids heavy with sleep, and he looked up at the large figure, blond hair pushed back, blue eyes full of worry.

“Thor...?” Thor smiled and Loki settled back down, closing his eyes again, feeling like he was missing something, something _important_...

“Loki, are you awake?” Thor's voice came.

“Mhmm,” Loki mumbled sleepily, nodding. “'M tired.”

“Then sleep, brother,” Thor murmured. “I'll keep you safe.”

Loki sighed, smiling a little.

_No, Loki_ .

Loki's eyes shot open and he sat up,k scrambling backwards away from Thor until he accidentally fell out of bed. He yelped as he fell on the floor in an undignified heap and Thor peered over the edge, frowning a bit. “...Brother?”

“I was falling!” Loki said. “I was- I...” He looked down at his hands. “I let _go_ ,” he whispered, trembling slightly. “Stupid, stupid, _stupid_ -” He curled up and Thor got up, going around and kneeling next to him.

“Loki,” he said softly, “what do you remember?”

Loki hugged himself and shook his head, and Thor wrapped his arms around his little brother. “Loki, brother, you are safe. I promise, no harm will come to you.”

“I'm sorry,” Loki said in a strangled whisper. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm a _fool_ -”

“Peace, Loki,” Thor said, holding him close. “What do you remember?”

Loki let out a strangled cry. “It was  _dark_ ,” he whispered, fingers tangling in Thor's shirt. “It was dark, and cold, and- and I was  _alone_ -”

“Shh,” Thor soothed, stroking his hair again and lifting him onto the bed. “Shh, brother. Everything is well.”

“I was _afraid_ ,” Loki said, voice breaking. Thor continued to hold him, gently rocking.

“There's nothing to be afraid of now,” Thor said. “I promise, Loki. There's nothing to be afraid of.”

“I'm sorry,” Loki whispered again. “I'm sorry, Thor, I'm sorry...”

“So am I, little brother,” Thor replied. “For everything.”

Loki sobbed as Thor hugged him tighter, whispering “You're safe, you're safe, Loki, I promise. You're safe, you're  _home_ . You're home.”

“Not falling,” Loki whispered, looking up at Thor like it was a question.

“Not falling,” Thor echoed firmly. “Safe on the ground, right here. Understand? And don't you ever _dare_ do that again, Loki. Ever, ever, ever.” He pressed his cheek to the top of Loki's head. “We thought we had lost you.”

“Did you mourn?” Loki whispered. Thor paused.

“Yes,” he said at last. “Every day.”

Loki looked up, tears still on his face, eyes red. He sniffed. “I'm sorry.”

“Hush,” Thor said, cupping his cheeks. “I know, Loki. And know in return that I am sorry as well. I am sorry that I ignored you. I am sorry that I made you feel like less than you were, and for not reassuring you when others did the same. I am sorry for not being there when you needed me, for not protecting you, for not realizing that you _did_ need me. I am sorry for all that and more, brother. My brother.”

“But I'm not-” Loki's lip trembled. “But I'm...”

“Oh, Loki,” Thor murmured, bowing his head. “Had I know, I _never_ would have said the things I did.” He looked back up. “Father told me everything. And Loki, do not think for a single _moment_ that it changes anything. You are still my little brother. You are still Loki Odinson, Prince of Asgard.”

“But I-” Loki struggled. “I tried to-” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I tried to kill you,” he said brokenly.

“I forgive you,” Thor said simply.

“You're too forgiving,” Loki sniffed.

“Perhaps,” Thor replied. “But I have done more than enough damage, so I can only ask this in return. Loki, my brother, can you find it in yourself to forgive _me_?”

Loki sniffed again and nodded. Thor's face broke into a smile and he hugged Loki again. “Do you need anything to eat? Drink?”

“No,” Loki whispered. “I'm just tired.”

“Ah,” Thor let go, but Loki's fingers twisted into his tunic again. Thor looked down and Loki squeezed his eyes shut.

“Stay.”

Thor stroked Loki's hair. “I will,” he said. “Lay down, okay?”

Loki did as Thor said, and Thor laid down next to him, Loki finding warmth again.

“Sleep, Loki,” Thor murmured. “I'll be here when you wake.”

“Promise?” Loki said, looking up.

“You have my word,” Thor replied. Loki finally relaxed and closed his eyes, going back to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> ?????? I don't know????? I had my wisdom teeth removed yesterday and I wrote this to escape the boredom of not really being able to do anything???
> 
> So yeah. It's an idea I got about a month ago, and I might reuse it in later fics. Oh, and this is my first time using this sort of format, with the long oneshot, so tell me how you like it, yeah?


End file.
